Must I tiptoe, Mother?

On By Anna EastlandIn motherhood, Poetry, Stillbirth

“Must I tiptoe, Mother, into this world?

Tread so softly I won’t be noticed—

hold in my newborn cries

in a wake of silence

for the one gone before me?

Must I pretend I am not here?”

  

“No, my little love, no,

for we want you and the world needs

your little bright light

as much as any other.

There is no one else 

who could ever be you.”

21 thoughts on “Must I tiptoe, Mother?”

      1. No, please don’t be sorry! Funnily enough, Josephine has been in my thoughts lately, even before I visited your blog. I have been revelling in my two little girls and the beauty of their babyhood. At the same time, I feel a small ache as I think of how you never got to spend this time with Josephine. It makes me sad, but it’s also a good ache. It reminds me to be present to them and not resent their occasional sleep-theft. I was overjoyed to read that you’re expecting again and I can imagine how mixed-up your emotions must be. This poem is so beautiful. I’ll be thinking of you and praying for you on Wednesday, and again in November xxx

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      3. Oh my, how embarrassing. You might be wondering why I said I’d be thinking of you on Wednesday. In my sleep-deprived state, I got mixed up about Josephine’s anniversary and thought it was a month earlier. And I was feeling so proud of myself for remembering!

        So, in short, I’ll be thinking of you at the end of the month and will avoid operating any heavy machinery in the meantime…

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      4. No, no, you are right! It was her anniversary on September 30th! And it was incredibly sweet to remember! We did have a party for her….kids didn’t want to pass up the chance to celebrate with cake…and to honour her birthday into Heaven. I just was tired after and didn’t post anything yet. But you are the best Australian auntie, ever, and totally got it right!

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      5. I think perhaps this current baby thinks he is partly Australian, because he likes to be awake when your side of the world is bursting about…its 3:30 am here right now! 😉

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