Just Breathe

There was another year of Covid,

but we crawled out of our caves

like newborn butterflies with sticky wings,

slow and hesitant in the spring sunshine.


We hoped to migrate to a new home

of our own, a fresh start…

but the inheritance was not enough.

Nevertheless the landlord said, “Go.”


A flutter of wings, a flurry,

a tiny hurricane of stress,

and searching, searching, searching

for a safe place to land.


A flying in the dark

—a trusting through blindness—

through not knowing at all

what was meant to be.


The summer sun swelled with heat

yet no shady dale

or safe valley dappled with sunshine

appeared—until it did.


And then it did.


Out of the concrete embrace

of the city we flew,

away from sirens and cement

towards the cedars and starlight.

Towards wind whispering in the fir trees,

the moon staring at me on my patio

and winking as I grin and grin

at the wonder of my new home.


And evenings filled with sunshine

sparkling in the sprinkler-kissed grasses

of the wildflower field

that is my unmowed back yard.

And glistening on the rosy skin

of my newborn daughter,

sleeping like a little wild nymph

in my joyful arms.

“And all is well

And all is well

And all manner of things

shall be well.”

Julian of Norwich

Crazy Land is on the move!

Big news! We are moving less than one week! Our house has become a giant cardboard box fort. I’ve been slinging my tape guns so much I need a cowboy hat to complete the look. Even the baby is helping out…sort of…  

We are so excited about our new place, which is right in the neighbourhood we were hoping for, only 2 1/2 blocks from our parish! It will be awesome to have another room, and two floors instead of one. For some reason the kids are very excited to have stairs for the first time in our suite!

It wasn’t easy to find, and definitely is an answered prayer…I say this because looking for a new home to rent in the city when you have six kids is kind of like asking if you can bring six large dogs to a wedding…people look at you like you’re crazy and take back the invitation. “There just wouldn’t be room for you all,” they say. 

So many potential landlords turned us down once they heard we had six kids. Sometimes politely, sometimes….not so much. One reluctant realtor for an old small 4 bedroom house, which would likely soon be a tear down anyway, sounded reluctant but said, “They are all yours?! Well, we can’t refuse kids (he didn’t say technically, but it was under his breath), so I guess if you can manage them all…” Needless to say, we decided against the reluctant realtor of the rusty gated shabby house…and the next day, I found our current place: a beautiful newly renovated three bedroom with abundant bathrooms for all our little munchkins. No more pee dances while Daddy is in the shower! 

The lovely thing is that our new landlords are so welcoming, and actually wanted a family to live there! I had prayed for God to give me a really clear sign when I found the right house, so I would know it was the one He had waiting for us. I was asking St. Joseph to pray for us to find a home for our family, as he had to moved the Holy Family several times and knew what this kind of uncertainty was like. Well, guess what my new landlord’s name is? Joe, and he’s a carpenter! God has a good sense of humor.

To top it off, a friend who didn’t even know we needed a new one gave us a beautiful queen size mattress. Our old one was definitely ready for the dump! The kids are using it as a trampoline in the living room until it goes.
I have been missing you all and will give you more updates when I can! I’ve been so busy packing all day for the last few weeks and sending away loads to the thrift store, with the help of very generous friends, who have been helping me dig through my stuff and pair it down. The u-haul is booked for this Saturday, and a bunch of friends from our parish, including our sweet friend Father McDonnell, are coming to help us move our things, while a few others are going to help me set up the essentials at the new house. Hurrah!