The peanut gallery strikes again

It’s been a while since I shared some words from my littles…the first two quotes are from three years ago…but at last, here they are!

Mind Reader

One Saturday I was unsuccessfully trying to indulge in a few moments alone to read my book from the library (I actually got one for me–hurrah!). Of course, despite sitting quietly  on the far corner of my bed with the door closed, I was soon detected by the mommy radars and joined by several munchkins.

5 year old daughter: What are you doing, Mummy?

Me: Reading my book.

Her: But you’re being quiet. Do you hear it inside your head?

Me: Yes.

Her: Leaning her forehead against mine and staring at me seriously with her giant blue eyes, “If I come really close, can I hear it, too?”

Self-Knowledge

One late afternoon I was cuddling my 5 year old and being goofy (by that time of day my few remaining braincells have usually lost any remaining ability to function normally).

Me: Fancy meeting you here! Do I know you?

Her: Yes, I’m me.

Me: Hi, Me…oh, I thought I was me?

Her: No, you’re you!

And one more from just the other day…

 Aliens Among Us

My four year old: Mom, how big does people get? Six?

Me: Six feet tall, you mean?

Him: Maaahm, that would be an alien, with six feet!

New Quotes from the Peanut Gallery


Sizing up her grade:
My almost 5 year old girl: “This is a lot of yogurt, Mum! It’s full up to here.”

Me:
“Oh, yeah? If you eat it all up you’ll get really big. You’ll be a giant and you’ll have to be in grade six instead of kindergarten!”

Her, walking by indignantly: “No, that’s silly. If I was a giant I’d be in grade 100!”

Nursing the baby:

Almost 5 year old daughter: “How come you have the milk on both sides?”

Me: “Because I have two breasts and that’s where the milk is made.”

Her: “What if you had three? Here, and here and here.”

Me: “That would be funny. Pig mummies have them all down their bellies so they can feed lots of baby pigs.” 

Her: “And ladies have two in case they have two babies and they’re both hungry at the same time.”

Me: “That’s right.”

More Quotes from the Peanut Gallery

  

Hiccups
2 year old boy: “I keep hicking up.”

 5 year old girl: “Hicking up is the only sickness where you can still do lots of stuff. The only thing you can’t do when you’re hicking up is not interrupt.”

Fog

4 year old girl:“Why is it so blurry outside?”

Concentration

9 year old girl, while doing math: “Sigh, I wish I was a boy!”

Me: “Why??”

Her: “So I could just focus on one thing! I get so distracted…”

…ah yes, women and multitasking….

Church

5 year old girl: “I like going to Mass every day because it feels like it is Jesus’ birthday every day. Like always Christmas but never much snowing.”

Tummy-Flutes and Air-Sickness

  

3 year old: “Mama, what does tummy-flute mean?”

Me: “A what?”

5 year old: “She means tummy flu.”

Me: “Oh, to have a sick stomach and need to throw up.”

3 year old: “I won’t throw up cause I only have a little tummy-flute.”

Me: “Oh, that’s good.”

3 year old: “Sorry, I have a coughing tummy; don’t worry. And I keep coughing and the air doesn’t get my cough because the air doesn’t want my cough but I don’t want to be sick, except the air wants to be sick but it doesn’t want to have the tummy flu.”

Me: “Ooooh….”

Quotes from the Peanut Gallery #2

Multitasking:

Me: Can you cut this paper dolly out for your sister?

6 yr old: Sure. I have time to do lots of things, but not time to do lots of things at the same time.


Weather Report:

4yr old: “Mommy the clouds turned purple. The clouds turned purple because they are angry that it’s not raining anymore.”


Royal Duties:

While training her 4 year old sister to be a polite princess, my 7 year old explained why the 3 year old couldn’t join in and be a queen.

“Because queens are really old, and it’s boring…actually it’s a lot of work. You have rule a village, and to sit on a bench all day and read newspapers…and eat chocolate all day until you get sick.”

“What if it tasted like coffee chocolate?” piped up the 4 year old. “That would be awful.”

“I wanna be a princess and dance!” moaned the distraught toddler.

Mouth Mumbles:

3 year old: “He has an ice cream lipstash…”