Everybody Needs Dear Friends


It’s a simple fact of life that we all need close friends. They are the ones who make life more bearable when it’s hard, and make it more joyful when there’s happiness to share. They are the ones we call on bad days when we need a laugh, or on dark nights when we need to cry.

For me, Jay and Laura Dear have always been these kind of friends. They are the first friends of my first boyfriend (now husband) that I met, and they embraced me—a skinny, nervous 19 year old—right from the start. For this I’ll forever be grateful. They made me feel like family.

James and I used to curl up on their couch watching movies with them and eating their yummy black bean burritos. Their house was always cosy and safe. It’s where I went all upset when I got fired from a café in university for getting swindled out of too much change. It’s where I watched in shock as the Twin Towers crashed down on 9/11. No matter what was happening in my life, laughter and hugs awaited me there.

So you can understand that when Laura, my confidant, my maid of honour, my loyal friend and kindred spirit, called asking for me help the other day, my answer was, “Of course!”

Her little nephew in Ontario, Kyram, a sweet-tempered little boy with major disabilities, is in need. He was born very early, just over half-way though the pregnancy. Amazingly, Kyram made it and is now almost 9 years old but he requires 24 hour care, even to make sure he keeps breathing at night. Sadly his mother Simone passed away a few years after Kyram’s birth. His loving father Myles, Jay’s brother, being a single working parent, has to have hired help for Kyram whenever he can’t be there himself. Naturally, this is very expensive but funds from Simone’s life insurance have run out. Please join us in praying for a financial solution for Kyram’s care.

Here is a link to Kyram’s YouCaring.com page where you can learn more about him and, if you feel called to do so, make a tax deductible donation that goes towards covering his medical expenses. Kyram’s family would also appreciate it if you could share his story and let others know about his fundraising campaign. The website has links for sharing through Facebook and other social media.


Life is so much richer when we reach out and touch other hearts. May you be surrounded always by many dear friends, and never know the loneliness of struggling alone.

Here is a link to a recent news article about Kyram:

Kyram Dear

Helping Heroes: 10 Reasons It’s a Good Thing to Accept Help.


Accepting help is hard to do for many people…it’s something we need to learn in life, or perhaps relearn after losing our childhood ability to reach out and take a helping hand without shame. Often as grown-ups we feel the need to be a superhero and do it all alone, but aren’t the Avengers much better as a team?

If we can see our fellow human beings as cooperators, instead of competitors, we’ll be a lot more willing to offer and accept help. After all, aren’t we all trying to do our little bit to make the world a better place?


It can be hard to swallow our pride and ask for assistance, so here’s ten reasons why it’s good to ask for help:

1. You need it. Come on, no one is perfect. Everybody struggles. To pretend otherwise is to pretend to be a robot. People are much more loveable.


2. You give others an opportunity to shine. Let someone else be the hero for once. You don’t need to take all the credit. Everyone has special talents, and getting to use them helps people feel useful and important.


3. Being vulnerable enough to ask for help allows others to be honest about themselves with you and deepens friendship. It opens the door for them to ask for help or advice, too. You come to know each other better.


4. You teach your kids to do the same. Do you want them to tough it out alone when they really need help, or to know how to lean on others in hard times? They will imitate you in this.


5. Doing stuff together is way more fun. Whether it’s a big shopping trip, cleaning the garage, trying a new recipe or artistic endeavour, life is more fun when you have someone to share the load and laugh with.


6. You allow others to love you. We all show our love in different ways, but many of us show our affection by acts of kindness and generosity. When we say no to these things, we are saying no to love.


7. Accepting help enables you to practice gratitude, which makes your life more beautiful and happy. Moreover, knowing how to accept help gracefully is attractive.


8. If it takes a village to raise a child, it also takes one to be a good parent or spouse. Think about this. Becoming the best person you can be doesn’t happen in isolation.


9. You’re not alone. There are probably ten people who would drop everything to come help you, if you just asked. When we open our hearts to help from others, we receive so much more than we imagined; unexpected goodness keeps coming when we open this door.


10. Cause I said so. So there.


Now wasn’t that helpful? 😉