Tag: motherhood

Human Heart Divine

On By Anna EastlandIn Poetry2 Comments

Tonight,after another long day of unpacking
and sorting the mismatched socks which mysteriously followed us
to the new house (how? how?),
we walk the two blocks to church—so close!—
and attend the Mass of the Sacred Heart.

Jesus awaits us. 
And amidst the glow of candles
and the flowing melody of chant
my spirit begins to breathe again,
having been slightly suffocated 
by walls of cardboard boxes.
In this open space, my heart expands.

The silence is pregnant with poetry—
the words which have been bottled up inside,
which my hands have longed to release,
begin to emerge and the urge to write grows stronger. 

My little ones are sleepy
the baby dream chuckles and snores somnolently in the snugly
cosy and safe as in God’s pocket. 

My toddler clutches his toy car,
which is always magically in his hands
no matter where we go,
until sleep releases it from his grip
with a small clatter.

  
 
My five year old slides over 
with her stuffy peaking out of her coat,
her eyes wide open and insistent,
as she asks me a pressing question 
“Do bunnies eat petals?”
“Yes!”

“I know,” whispers my four year old,
Let’s pretend we’re in a movie theatre.”
I grin and breathe in deeply to let the incense fill my lungs 
as the shimmer of golden vestments brightens my eyes. 

Under the everyday human humdrum,
runs the divine,
like blood under skin—
hidden, life giving, essential. 
The heart of God
pierced with the sorrow of love for us
stoops down to touch us gently…
an embrace filled with yearning. 

Rain drums on the roof 
and we are cradled inside the cosy wooden church
as if in the ark,
riding the waves of our life
to the shore beyond…
seekers listening for the gentle sound of a dove
as the Holy Spirit leads us forward. 

feathery  beginnings 

On By Anna EastlandIn Poetry8 Comments

at almost seven weeks

you have just the faint feathery beginnings 

of eyelashes beginning to show

extravagent delicacy 

decorating your face with tiny blond wisps

as if your wide open baby blue eyes

weren’t wondrous enough 
  

How to peacefully bathe a newborn 

On By Anna EastlandIn Family Life, motherhoodLeave a comment

Newborns love being all cuddled and cosy, curled up close to mom like they were in the womb, so often their least favourite thing is getting their diaper changed or having a bath, because they feel vulnerable and exposed. They wave their skinny little arms as though they were falling, and look very startled. This means that first baths can be a bit of a scream festival, which is hard on new babies and new mommies and daddies alike. When you’re sleep deprived and your hormones are raging, the last thing you want to do is something you know will set off baby alarm bells. 

So how to avoid this? Is there a way to bathe a newborn peacefully? Yes! Please learn from my mistakes, and do it the better way. When I bathed my first daughter, I was so nervous. I didn’t want her to get burned by hot water or drown, so I only put a few inches of lukewarm water in her baby bath tub, and took forever to bathe her with baby soap before rinsing her off. She hated it of course, as she was so cold! I hated it, too! Her crying was making me so upset. 

Here are simple steps to a better way:

 

  1. Fill the baby bathtub really full, till almost the top.
  2. Use really warm water. Not actually hot…but much warmer than you would think, remembering that water cools quickly in the small tub. 
  3. Cradle the back of your baby’s head with your right hand, supporting his body with your arm. To make this easier I put our baby bath up on the counter, or you could use a table instead, with a towel under it. Then you don’t have to bend way over, and get a sore back. 
  4. Lay the other arm on top of baby to hold him secure, and if he likes, let him suck in your finger to soothe himself. When I did this last time, my newbie got so relaxed he almost fell asleep! 
  5. Get your spouse or an older child to gently pour a little water over baby’s head (not face) and in those little creases of the neck where milk hides. 
  6. Keep the bath brief, about 5 minutes or so, and don’t bother with soap at first. Newborns smell lovely, and just need a little dip to freshen up every now and then. Bedsides, you are constantly wiping them during diaper changes or cleaning their little faces with a warm cloth, so in my opinion you don’t need to feel pressured to bathe them every day, unless you want to! 
  7. Choose a moment when you are fairly relaxed, and can ignore the phone or other interruptions and just enjoy this cosy moment with your beautiful, precious new mini you!
  8. Have a cosy towel and blanket ready, and follow the bath with a nice snuggle and some warm milk! 

  

You know you’re a mom when…

On By Anna EastlandIn motherhood2 Comments
  1. You find staring at your newborn while he sleeps more amusing and fulfilling than watching a movie.
  2. Your living room slow-dance partner is about 25-30 years younger than you and your main goal is getting him to sleep.
  3. Alone time means three minutes to yourself in the bathroom, before a tiny person comes to bang on the door, file a complaint, or shove their latest drawing under the door to show you because it just can’t wait!
  4. You worry Nike will sue you for copyright infringement if you use the word ‘just’ one more time (“Just eat your food!” “Just go to bed!” “Just get off the table!” “Just clean your room!” “Just stop hitting your sister!”).
  5. You get told more stories and given more artwork than you know what to do with, and you find it charming to be portrayed as a vegetable if drawn so by your 4 year old.
  6. You feel like bursting into song when you get in the shower, “Halellujah!” but are likely to be interrupted by emergencies…”Mom, Mom! Guess what?” “What? I can’t hear you! I’m in the shower!” “We did made a ….and it’s really…..in the living room!” “What! You made what in the living room?” “A ….” Turn off shower. Shiver. “What?” “We made a really cool fort in the living room! Come see!” “Oh! Please try to not interrupt unless it’s an emergency. I’ll see it after my shower.” Turn on shower. Sigh. Sing some more.
  7. Your idea of getting dolled up is putting in face cream and lip gloss.
  8. Your favourite new shoes are your sheepskin slippers.
  9. You’ve used rainbow loom elastics as hairties.
  10. You are the source of all wisdom for your kids, and have to answer all life’s deepest questions, but have the short term memory of a goldfish…”Now where did I leave my keys??”IMG_0638

Love Incarnate

On By Anna EastlandIn motherhood4 Comments

  

I love this image of Mother and Child…the beautiful peace and serenity that emanates from their contented faces. It speaks to my own experience in these early days of snuggles and nursing after birth. The simple bliss of needing nothing else in the world but the closeness of the other…

Through this image, as through the love between every mother and child, radiates the golden warmth of God’s love…affirming the goodness of the most ordinary and intimate relationships of our human lives. Confirming, in tiny bundles of love incarnate, that the essence of being human is indeed to love.
  

Hurrah! Baby arrived safely!

On By Anna EastlandIn Maternal Health, motherhood, Photos17 Comments

We are so happy and relieved to welcome our cosy little warm snuggly bundle into this world! Thank you everyone for all your prayers and support! We had a beautiful water birth at the hospital, and baby is sleeping and eating well. He is a cute little 6 lb 2 oz at three weeks early and is doing great! 

   
    
 

We had a big day getting this little monkey out, including drinking a labour smoothie, ’80’s dancing in the living room with my awesome midwife and the kids, walking to a lunch date for spicy Indian food with my husband, and scrubbing the floor on hands and knees. It worked!

Love and blessings to you all,

A very happy and content new mama, again!

A Letter to Heaven

On By Anna EastlandIn motherhood, Stillbirth3 Comments

  
Dear Little Jo,

Tomorrow is a big day for Mummy. Your little brother is going to be born. We are going to coax him out into the world three weeks early, in hopes that he can be safe. In hopes that things will go differently than last time. He kicks and wiggles hello to you, his big sister in Heaven. 

Know, my dear one, that you are very much in my heart right now, as ever. Your little brother is, as a friend told me today, one of your many gifts to me. So I thank you for constantly making my life richer, deeper and more exquisitely beautiful. How much I love you!

After losing you in labour last time, I am afraid. When I think about how I couldn’t save you, I tremble. I want to cry. I want to hide my head in my blankets and not come out. But I know there is a greater, deeper plan than the one I can understand. I know you are safe and beautiful and loved. That you always will be. 

And I want you to know, my little sweetheart, that no matter how much time passes, you will always be my special baby, even when you have grown wise beyond your brief time on earth by so much time spent in Heaven, that timeless place of Love, where I hope to join you one day. 

Save me a huge hug and so many kisses, and tomorrow shower us with the grace of your perfect little prayers, as your brother makes his epic journey into this world. I know that we are wrapped in the wings of angels, and lifted up by the strength of so many heartfelt prayers. 

I pray that our new little one may, above all, become like his sister, a saint—a sweet beacon of love for the world. 

All my heart’s embraces,

Your Mummy

The Feast of All Saints

Crimson and Gold

On By Anna EastlandIn motherhood, Photos2 Comments

I continue to be enchanted by the beauty of fall..which this year has had a slow mellow warmth, like the flickering of a cosy fire, flames all crimson and gold. 

   

    
   
My kids, who had been peacefully playing inside, were very happy to discover where Mummy had snuck off to for a few quiet moments of photography! Pretty fun that even though I’m with them all the time, after 3 minutes away, I get greeted like a rock star! 😉

  

Sunning the Moon Belly

On By Anna EastlandIn Homeschool, Maternal Health, motherhood, Poetry1 Comment

  

after a morning of spelling 
nursery rhymes
and writing practice
I take a moment’s break by myself
to sit on our garden bench in the sun

a tiny homeschool hiatus 
to sit quietly enough to hear 
the birds chirping and twittering
over the background hum
of city busses and summery lawnmowers
on this warm October morning

sun is supposed to be good
for this third trimester liver thing 
that has crept up on me again
so I expose my round belly
to glow like strange moon
blue veins faintly showing
in the bright sun

a small alien planet 
with the occasional surface ripple 
as the life within stretches and grows
just x-filish enough
to make me grin

Must I tiptoe, Mother?

On By Anna EastlandIn motherhood, Poetry, Stillbirth21 Comments

“Must I tiptoe, Mother, into this world?

Tread so softly I won’t be noticed—

hold in my newborn cries

in a wake of silence

for the one gone before me?

Must I pretend I am not here?”

  

“No, my little love, no,

for we want you and the world needs

your little bright light

as much as any other.

There is no one else 

who could ever be you.”